eating glass that has been sliced to ribbons

not talking
saying nothing
stagnation
painted, iridescent wallflower
pretty, listening
but quiet

a life unfulfilled
a life wrapped around my head
meticulously analyzed and inactively regretted
yet we're all facing this overwhelming force driving behind it all
that we all recognize yet can't seem to fulfill anything
in time
time
there will be time
the force is time
there will be time for time

but there isn't even an acknowledgement of time
there is no melancholy cyclical tragedy
there is no sleeping afternoons and evenings
not taking of tea
just me
quiet night alone
not part of the action but standing apart

i've been sliced to ribbons


i need to talk with katie alone
walk with katie, in a full blown
conversation on philosophy
and how we cope with anxiety
and then we'll just talk about nothing
and end up on the subject of everything
not knowing where to go
who to talk to, what to know.


this online collegesocial networking is great. although i have a hard time reading comments and responding to them, i like it a lot. it's scary, it's all scary...i love the prospect of college, of this future where i can be me unrestricted; where i can start over. i feel terrible for saying it, but it's true. i don't want to have to worry or be anxious anymore, i just want to be me. throughs, can you just let me be? can you let me be me?